"Because the promises that are given are not just promises to love the other when the other is lovely and lovable, but to love the other for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, and that means to love the other even at half-past three in the morning when the baby is crying and love each other with a terrible cold in the head and when the bills have to be paid."(F. Buechner "Listening to Your Life" p. 140)
This summer I will be officiating at three weddings. Two of the brides are people who were in my youth group in the past, young ladies that I've know since they were teenagers and younger. The other couple it is a second marriage for both. I haven't known them as long, but feel privileged to be a part of their new life together.
I don't know how many weddings I've officiated at over the years. Frankly they're not my favorite part of my job. Yet I do think that the promises made are somewhat awesome. I like the vows in the Book of Common Prayer, very simple, very direct. They invite a couple to really understand that life together will not always be a Kodak moment. But the love that brought them together will help them through the not so pleasant times. Yet that is often the times when things start to fall apart. I do think that part of the problem is that couples forget that they have people who promised to support them in their new life together. Yet there is something within our nature that causes us to withdraw or shut down at the very time that we need help.
I can't say that every wedding I've officiated at is still going strong. Some certainly are. I know as someone who has been married for almost 21 years, to truly enjoy the good times, I have to learn how to work through the rough patches.
Blessings,
Ed
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