"He said to them, 'why are you frightened and why do doubts arise in your hearts.'"(Luke 24:38)
If I were privileged to have a one on one with Jesus, he might very well ask me that question today. He'd notice that I'm not my usual self. My doubt is not actually a doubt about him, the resurrection or anything faith oriented. The doubt is self contained.
I would probably lay out what is scaring me right now. I'd hope that he'd just listen, let me air it out. Of course since I believe that to him all hearts are open, all desires known and no secrets are hid, he already is well aware of the problem. I'm sure he'd tell me he understands, he's been there himself. And that not to lose hope but to keep walking with him.
If he were to ask about the doubt, I know my answer would be I have evidence to support my conclusion, and I'd like to see the other possiblity but it is hard to change the viewpoint at the moment. Again I would hope to be listened to, and believe that I am heard. I might be invited to turn around to not get to calcified and to persevere.
You haven't been forsaken ever, why should this time be different. Keep moving brother, keep moving.
Blessings,
Ed
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