Reflections for 3/11/2010

"We used to try to avoid distractions. But it's much better to use our distractions. If you're obsessed with a thought all afternoon, that's what you give to God. Lord, why am I so caught up in this fantasy? Why am I so caught up in this preoccupation ? Why am I so worried about this bill or this mortgage or whatever it might be? Make that the subject of your prayer instead of trying to avoid it and getting into some spiritual or theological world. That's the meaning of integrated, incarnational prayer." (R. Rohr "Radical Grace" p. 124)

I had lunch with a group of colleagues this week. And we were all talking about various subjects one of which was our recent Diocesan Convention. I was sharing my frustration at the focus on what is called the fair share asking (basically what individual churches give financially to support the ministry of the Diocese.) It takes a lot of my energy because the parish I lead cannot give what is asked, we're not alone in that by the way. Yet I feel some level of guilt about that. One colleague turned to me and asked "why do you care?" And I didn't have an answer to that question. Yet it was taking up an awful lot of room in the what to worry about department.

Fr. Rohr's suggestion that we take those aspects of our life that seem to border on unnecessary worry or obsession and hand it over to God in prayer. This is actually great advice. When I let go of the stuff, I can do nothing about it frees up a ton of space to think and do creatively the things that are truly important and that I can actually do something about. Who knows I might even find they are the things that will bring true joy and contentment with them.

So how do you know the difference between unnecessary preoccupation and real worries? It seems to me that the true test is how much of my time is spent on the issue. If it seems more than necessary and is not moving, that may be a sign of where it belongs on the list of things for Ed to worry about as compared to the things God really needs Ed to focus on. Which maybe why he often says, why don't you let me have that one.

Blessings,
Ed