"A Christian is one who is on the way, though not necessarily very far along it, and who has at least some dim and half-baked idea of whom to thank. A Christian isn't necessarily any nicer than anybody else. Just better informed." (F. Buechner "Listening to Your Life" p. 58)
So what makes me a Christian? Well I know I've gone through the proper initiation of baptism. But so have lots of folks who wouldn't claim to be Christian. I've been Confirmed, but see previous comment on that. I do believe certain things about who Jesus is, and I think that's foundational. I try to pattern my life after Christ's, and I believe that's essential.
I certainly have met plenty of Christians who have right belief, but wrong praxis. I've met many folks who've got the praxis part correct, but no belief to undergird it.
I do consider myself on the way. On an earthly pilgrimage with God showing the path, Christ walking with me, and the Holy Spirit, nudging me along. I'm certainly not close to finishing the journey. I know who to thank and I know those who have shared time with me on that journey, and I'm thankful for them as well.
Blessings,
Ed
Monday, February 28, 2011
Sunday, February 27, 2011
Reflections for 2/27/11
"A wedding. A handshake. A kiss. A coronation. A parade. A dance. A meal. A graduation. A Mass. A ritual is the performance of an intuition, the rehearsal of a dream, the playing of a game."(F. Buechner "Listening to Your Life" p. 57)
I'm definitely a fan and practitioner of ritual. While I'd be described as the higher side of broad in my professional practice, personally I love real High Church liturgy. I love the smells and bells. The drama of it all. I especially love it when it is done well and with a sense of joy.
Rituals of course go well beyond religious practice, though they are prevalent there for sure. I have my rituals that sustain me each day. Getting up at roughly the same time. Making the lunches for those departing for the day. Go on my walk. Come back, drink coffee, eat breakfast. Take a shower. Off to work.
Rituals help frame our day to day living. Some might call them habits, but they give a sense of stability in our ever shifting world.
What are the rituals that sustain you? When you get out of them, do you notice? Have you fallen away from some and are now trying to get back on track?
Blessings,
Ed
I'm definitely a fan and practitioner of ritual. While I'd be described as the higher side of broad in my professional practice, personally I love real High Church liturgy. I love the smells and bells. The drama of it all. I especially love it when it is done well and with a sense of joy.
Rituals of course go well beyond religious practice, though they are prevalent there for sure. I have my rituals that sustain me each day. Getting up at roughly the same time. Making the lunches for those departing for the day. Go on my walk. Come back, drink coffee, eat breakfast. Take a shower. Off to work.
Rituals help frame our day to day living. Some might call them habits, but they give a sense of stability in our ever shifting world.
What are the rituals that sustain you? When you get out of them, do you notice? Have you fallen away from some and are now trying to get back on track?
Blessings,
Ed
Reflections for 2/26/11
"When you look at your face in the mirror, what do you see in it that you most like and what do you see in it that you most deplore? If you had only one last message to leave to the handful of people who are most important to you, what would it be in twenty-five words or less?...To hear yourself try to answer questions like these is to begin to hear something not only of who you are but of both what you are becoming and what you are failing to become." (F. Buechner "Listening to Your Life" pp.56-57)
Life often seems to be a series of questions. Some are easy what will I wear this morning? Some a little more complicated? Should I take this job? Others can really keep you up at night. Who am I? What am I doing with my life? Why me?
Yet those really hard ones are in fact the most important ultimately, and yet the ones that usually get pushed to the back of our minds.
We don't take stock of ourselves when things are going well for some reason. These questions seem to scream for answers when we are in a valley period or feel stuck. Perhaps if we took the time to address them when things are going well, they might not feel so overwhelming when we aren't in a good place.
Don't be afraid of that person in the mirror, but have an honest heart to heart with that person. You may be surprised with what you hear.
Blessings,
Ed
Life often seems to be a series of questions. Some are easy what will I wear this morning? Some a little more complicated? Should I take this job? Others can really keep you up at night. Who am I? What am I doing with my life? Why me?
Yet those really hard ones are in fact the most important ultimately, and yet the ones that usually get pushed to the back of our minds.
We don't take stock of ourselves when things are going well for some reason. These questions seem to scream for answers when we are in a valley period or feel stuck. Perhaps if we took the time to address them when things are going well, they might not feel so overwhelming when we aren't in a good place.
Don't be afraid of that person in the mirror, but have an honest heart to heart with that person. You may be surprised with what you hear.
Blessings,
Ed
Saturday, February 26, 2011
Reflections for 2/25/11
"Nothing in American history is more tragic surely than the relationship of the black and white races." (F. Buechner "Listening to Your Life" p. 55)
Racism is one of the many "isms" that infect our country. In spite of much progress in this realm it is still quite active and playing in our society. The election of Barack Obama, the first African-American President brought it back to the surface as an issue I believe.
I know that my Diocese is trying to address the issue through training workshops. I've been to one, and frankly I think its a good start but missed the point. We watched a video and the first scene is the KKK burning a cross. In my opinion that allowed all us good white folk to check out. Hey we don't burn crosses, we're not part of that terrorist organization. And could fall comfortably back into our notion that some of our friends are black and can't we just sing "We shall overcome" and go back home.
For me the biggest problem with trying to address racism is that no one can seem to agree on a definition. And that prejudice is often seen as a synonym for racism and it isn't. Racism, like all the "isms" is about power over based on race, gender, age etc. I may not be a bigot, but there are still elements of racism that I probably subconsciously hold.
Unlike many of my white clergy colleagues I grew up in an integrated school system. Metuchen was not lily-white, though sections of it surely were. I actually had in my K-12 experience six teachers of color. That may not seem like a huge number, but how many suburban schools have that many? I know that three of them I really liked and felt affirmed by. I also know that it felt like three hated me and made my life miserable. I doubt the difference in our race had much to do with it, but it gave me an appreciation for what my black classmates must have occasionally felt. I also will add that being an integrated school was not easy for me. My parents thought it was great, but I spent most of my time being afraid, especially in elementary school, I was a very easy target. Also being one of the smarter kids, there was only a few of the black kids that were with me, and I don't recall any males.
It wasn't until college that my built up racist views really got called into question. There I found black students who were at a minimum my intellectual equals, and in some cases were even smarter than me. I began at that point to let a lot of internal garbage go.
I also have had the benefit of working under black leaders. It is another really good way of breaking down that wall. In my own church I have had people of color in leadership roles. Steps towards eradicating racism.
I have a feeling that really the only way we will ever truly come close to eliminating racism, is through relationships. When we can get past the "some of my best friends are black" mentality. When we can really listen and not get defensive when folks who aren't white, let us know how the world works for and against them, it will be even bigger steps towards that goal.
And of course the first steps always begin with me.
Blessings,
Ed
Racism is one of the many "isms" that infect our country. In spite of much progress in this realm it is still quite active and playing in our society. The election of Barack Obama, the first African-American President brought it back to the surface as an issue I believe.
I know that my Diocese is trying to address the issue through training workshops. I've been to one, and frankly I think its a good start but missed the point. We watched a video and the first scene is the KKK burning a cross. In my opinion that allowed all us good white folk to check out. Hey we don't burn crosses, we're not part of that terrorist organization. And could fall comfortably back into our notion that some of our friends are black and can't we just sing "We shall overcome" and go back home.
For me the biggest problem with trying to address racism is that no one can seem to agree on a definition. And that prejudice is often seen as a synonym for racism and it isn't. Racism, like all the "isms" is about power over based on race, gender, age etc. I may not be a bigot, but there are still elements of racism that I probably subconsciously hold.
Unlike many of my white clergy colleagues I grew up in an integrated school system. Metuchen was not lily-white, though sections of it surely were. I actually had in my K-12 experience six teachers of color. That may not seem like a huge number, but how many suburban schools have that many? I know that three of them I really liked and felt affirmed by. I also know that it felt like three hated me and made my life miserable. I doubt the difference in our race had much to do with it, but it gave me an appreciation for what my black classmates must have occasionally felt. I also will add that being an integrated school was not easy for me. My parents thought it was great, but I spent most of my time being afraid, especially in elementary school, I was a very easy target. Also being one of the smarter kids, there was only a few of the black kids that were with me, and I don't recall any males.
It wasn't until college that my built up racist views really got called into question. There I found black students who were at a minimum my intellectual equals, and in some cases were even smarter than me. I began at that point to let a lot of internal garbage go.
I also have had the benefit of working under black leaders. It is another really good way of breaking down that wall. In my own church I have had people of color in leadership roles. Steps towards eradicating racism.
I have a feeling that really the only way we will ever truly come close to eliminating racism, is through relationships. When we can get past the "some of my best friends are black" mentality. When we can really listen and not get defensive when folks who aren't white, let us know how the world works for and against them, it will be even bigger steps towards that goal.
And of course the first steps always begin with me.
Blessings,
Ed
Thursday, February 24, 2011
Reflections for 2/24/11
"It is supposed to be good for the heart, the lungs, the muscles, and physical well-being generally. It is also said to produce a kind of euphoria known as joggers' high. the look of anguish and despair that contorts the faces of most of the people you see huffing and puffing away at it by the side of the road, however, is striking. If you didn't know directly from them that they are having the time of their lives the chances are you wouldn't be likely to guess it." (F. Buechner "Listening to Your Life" p. 55)
I'll admit it I'm not into running or jogging. Even when I was in peak physical condition in high school, I didn't like running. My problem now is that I don't believe my knees can take the pounding, compound that with the extra baggage I still carry on my frame.
I have been going to the gym regularly now since May of last year. I'm not a gym rat, but it has become a part of my routine. I wouldn't say I like it or come out with an excercisers' high. But I know that I do feel better physically than I have in years and I also know that by continuing to go, I will continue to improve and there will ultimately be less of me to love.
I believe a similar statement could be made about spiritual practices or just about any activity we do to better ourselves. On the outside we may not always give off an aura of happiness or satisfaction. Inwardly something different is going on.
I'm reminded of Jesus' statement that when you fast don't distort your face so that others may see your fasting. Do the actions without the dramatics. I suppose this is true of almost everything that we do. When we're doing it for all the right reasons, no one should be able to tell just by looking at our outward appearance.
Blessings,
Ed
I'll admit it I'm not into running or jogging. Even when I was in peak physical condition in high school, I didn't like running. My problem now is that I don't believe my knees can take the pounding, compound that with the extra baggage I still carry on my frame.
I have been going to the gym regularly now since May of last year. I'm not a gym rat, but it has become a part of my routine. I wouldn't say I like it or come out with an excercisers' high. But I know that I do feel better physically than I have in years and I also know that by continuing to go, I will continue to improve and there will ultimately be less of me to love.
I believe a similar statement could be made about spiritual practices or just about any activity we do to better ourselves. On the outside we may not always give off an aura of happiness or satisfaction. Inwardly something different is going on.
I'm reminded of Jesus' statement that when you fast don't distort your face so that others may see your fasting. Do the actions without the dramatics. I suppose this is true of almost everything that we do. When we're doing it for all the right reasons, no one should be able to tell just by looking at our outward appearance.
Blessings,
Ed
Reflections for 2/23/11
"If you lose yourself in your work you find who you are. If you express the best you have in you in your work it is more than just the best you have in you that you are expressing."(F. Buechner "Listening to Your Life" p.55)
I don't know that I get lost in my work too much. I probably guard against work taking over my life. I certainly give the proper attention to what I do, and usually attempt to give my best when I'm "on." But I find who I am is more complex than just a priest.
Now the things I do well and enjoy the most in my work are being present for others and listening. Those are two skill sets I need to be effective in the other parts of my job. What I've found to be true is that it is actually the best of what I have to offer outside of work.
I try to be present and a good listener to my family and friends outside of the church. Only they can tell if I've been successful in that.
Is what you do for work utilizing the best in you? Or are your gifts and talents revealed elsewhere? Does work seem to take over your life, or do you have time for other things as well, that make up who you really are?
Blessings,
Ed
I don't know that I get lost in my work too much. I probably guard against work taking over my life. I certainly give the proper attention to what I do, and usually attempt to give my best when I'm "on." But I find who I am is more complex than just a priest.
Now the things I do well and enjoy the most in my work are being present for others and listening. Those are two skill sets I need to be effective in the other parts of my job. What I've found to be true is that it is actually the best of what I have to offer outside of work.
I try to be present and a good listener to my family and friends outside of the church. Only they can tell if I've been successful in that.
Is what you do for work utilizing the best in you? Or are your gifts and talents revealed elsewhere? Does work seem to take over your life, or do you have time for other things as well, that make up who you really are?
Blessings,
Ed
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
Reflections for 2/22/11
"Jobs are what people do for a living, many of them for eight hours a day, five days a week, minus vacations, for most their lives. It is tragic to think how few of them have their hearts in it. They work mainly for the purpose of making money enough to enjoy their moments of not working." (F. Buechner "Listening to Your Life" p. 54)
I have had two jobs in my life that I could see that if that had been what I did for all of my life, I'd fully understand what Buechner is saying.
I spent one summer working for the Department of Public Works in my hometown. As a summer job, it actually was somewhat fun. We were done by 4:00 pm, it involved mowing lawn, and frankly there was an awful lot of goofing off. And even when I moved up to being on the garbage truck, the work was a little harder but actually more fascinating. Outside of the physicality of it, though it wasn't all that challenging but it gave me a steady salary. I know I wouldn't feel so romantic about that summer if I had to do the same thing all year round.
I also was a bank teller for a year. That too is something that was necessary at the time, needed health benefits and no Sundays.
What is true of both jobs was how much of a sense of TGIF there was. How people couldn't wait for the day to be over, and how often the day dragged.
I have known folks who have to work those kind of jobs. They have bills to pay. They look forward to their vacations and retirement. But the day to day grind seems rather joyless.
I'm thankful for my work, not only because it helps pay the bills, but because I really do enjoy it, 95% of the time. I too will retire at some point, but it isn't the driving force for me at the moment.
If you are fortunate to have work that you truly love it is a great thing. If you are stuck in "dead end job." Where to quote the Loverboy song "everybody's working for the weekend.," then I hope you have some outlet for your creativity. Something that gives your life meaning and purpose, well beyond paying the bills.
Blessings,
Ed
I have had two jobs in my life that I could see that if that had been what I did for all of my life, I'd fully understand what Buechner is saying.
I spent one summer working for the Department of Public Works in my hometown. As a summer job, it actually was somewhat fun. We were done by 4:00 pm, it involved mowing lawn, and frankly there was an awful lot of goofing off. And even when I moved up to being on the garbage truck, the work was a little harder but actually more fascinating. Outside of the physicality of it, though it wasn't all that challenging but it gave me a steady salary. I know I wouldn't feel so romantic about that summer if I had to do the same thing all year round.
I also was a bank teller for a year. That too is something that was necessary at the time, needed health benefits and no Sundays.
What is true of both jobs was how much of a sense of TGIF there was. How people couldn't wait for the day to be over, and how often the day dragged.
I have known folks who have to work those kind of jobs. They have bills to pay. They look forward to their vacations and retirement. But the day to day grind seems rather joyless.
I'm thankful for my work, not only because it helps pay the bills, but because I really do enjoy it, 95% of the time. I too will retire at some point, but it isn't the driving force for me at the moment.
If you are fortunate to have work that you truly love it is a great thing. If you are stuck in "dead end job." Where to quote the Loverboy song "everybody's working for the weekend.," then I hope you have some outlet for your creativity. Something that gives your life meaning and purpose, well beyond paying the bills.
Blessings,
Ed
Monday, February 21, 2011
Reflections for 2/21/11
"All roads lead to Rome, they say, and ours leads us a crooked way."(F. Buechner "Listening to Your Life" p. 53)
When we bought our used Chrysler Town and Country one of the items the previous owner had in the car was a navigation system. I'll admit that I like having it, but I don't know if I was buying a new car that it would be something I would pay extra for.
With this system I can ask it to calculate the trip based on quickest route or least use of freeways among the choices. I usually take the quickest route, which seems to be based on what the speed limit is on the roads. Inevitably this will mean Interstate Highways.
The quickest route however is not always the most interesting. One may miss some fascinating and beautiful sights. You might eat quicker on the highways, but the food might be more interesting on the local roads.
A fantasy of mine would be to just drive around the country taking the scenic routes. To see all the wonderful things this country has, some well known, others only known to the locals. If they'd like to resurrect Charles Kuralt's on the Road show again, I'll be the first in line.
I think there's also a parallel to living life in this. We can choose to get on the quickest route, rushing through each day and year, getting to some mile marker in our life. The problem is we may miss some of the most incredible moments because we were living life at warp speed.
Life's journey is more interesting to me in the slower lane. I still know where the journey ends, I just don't know when. Why not enjoy it while I'm still in the drivers seat.
Blessings,
Ed
When we bought our used Chrysler Town and Country one of the items the previous owner had in the car was a navigation system. I'll admit that I like having it, but I don't know if I was buying a new car that it would be something I would pay extra for.
With this system I can ask it to calculate the trip based on quickest route or least use of freeways among the choices. I usually take the quickest route, which seems to be based on what the speed limit is on the roads. Inevitably this will mean Interstate Highways.
The quickest route however is not always the most interesting. One may miss some fascinating and beautiful sights. You might eat quicker on the highways, but the food might be more interesting on the local roads.
A fantasy of mine would be to just drive around the country taking the scenic routes. To see all the wonderful things this country has, some well known, others only known to the locals. If they'd like to resurrect Charles Kuralt's on the Road show again, I'll be the first in line.
I think there's also a parallel to living life in this. We can choose to get on the quickest route, rushing through each day and year, getting to some mile marker in our life. The problem is we may miss some of the most incredible moments because we were living life at warp speed.
Life's journey is more interesting to me in the slower lane. I still know where the journey ends, I just don't know when. Why not enjoy it while I'm still in the drivers seat.
Blessings,
Ed
Sunday, February 20, 2011
Reflections for 2/20/11
"If we are to love God, we must first stop, look, and listen for him in what is happening around us and inside us. If we are to love our neighbors, before doing anything else we must see our neighbors. With our imagination as well as our eyes, that is to say like artists, we must see not just their faces but the life behind and within their faces. Here it is love that is the frame we see them in." (F. Buechner "Listening to Your Life" p. 53)
When I think of something be framed, I immediately go to a picture. Old photographs capture a moment, and later on can be brought out of box or looked at in an album to catch a glimpse, to remind us of what was. They can stir within us memories of how we may have felt, but they don't tell us how we felt. They may also bring forth from us reactions that we do not expect, a tear, a smile.
Love being the framework in which to work out my relationships is important I believe. We are invited throughout scripture to love God. That is the frame in which we work. It sets some boundaries to do that searching so that we don't wander all over the place trying to cover too much ground. That is not to say that we may need to move to a new frame in our continued seeking. There are of course moments when we hear, see and sense in other ways God's presence. All again framed for the moment. Perhaps to be remembered at a later time.
The same is true for loving neighbor. The frame in which I work out that relationship, or contemplate actions that will affect others has to put a face with it. I need to imagine the who, what and where's before moving forward. Sometimes the faces are very clear and have names, other times they share only a common humanity.
What is the framework in which you live? How do you capture moments that inform who you are?
Blessings,
Ed
When I think of something be framed, I immediately go to a picture. Old photographs capture a moment, and later on can be brought out of box or looked at in an album to catch a glimpse, to remind us of what was. They can stir within us memories of how we may have felt, but they don't tell us how we felt. They may also bring forth from us reactions that we do not expect, a tear, a smile.
Love being the framework in which to work out my relationships is important I believe. We are invited throughout scripture to love God. That is the frame in which we work. It sets some boundaries to do that searching so that we don't wander all over the place trying to cover too much ground. That is not to say that we may need to move to a new frame in our continued seeking. There are of course moments when we hear, see and sense in other ways God's presence. All again framed for the moment. Perhaps to be remembered at a later time.
The same is true for loving neighbor. The frame in which I work out that relationship, or contemplate actions that will affect others has to put a face with it. I need to imagine the who, what and where's before moving forward. Sometimes the faces are very clear and have names, other times they share only a common humanity.
What is the framework in which you live? How do you capture moments that inform who you are?
Blessings,
Ed
Saturday, February 19, 2011
Reflections for 2/19/11
"That life is grace for instance-the givenness of it the fathomlessness of it, the endless possibilities of its becoming transparent to something extraordinary beyond itself. That-as I picked up somewhere in Jung and whittled into the ash stick I use for tramping around through the woods sometimes-vocatus atque non vocatus Deus aderit, whic I take to mean that in the long run, whether you call on him or don't call on him, God will be present with you. That if we really had our eyes open, we would see that all moments are key moments. That he who does not love remains in death. That Jesus is the Word made flesh who dwells among us full of grace and truth. On good days I might add a few more to the list. On bad days it's possible there might be a few less." (F. Buechner "Listening to Your Life" pp.50-51)
Do I see life all of life as grace? I hope I do, but I'm certainly more convinced that I see grace filled moments in my life. That's probably where the list grows. I've also had some not so grace filled moments, probably when the list gets shorter.
Perhaps it is that grace is not something to be kept like a score in a game. Grace just is. When I wake up each morning and I"m still alive, my wife is still there, my kids still there, that's grace. When I pour milk on my cereal and enjoy my second cup of coffee that's grace. When throughout the day opportunities arise to do what I do well, that's grace. When I go home and enjoy a good dinner that's grace. When I fall asleep on my bed that's grace.
When I have a shouting match with my wife or kids, that too is grace, because in the end it can lead to reconciliation, or clearing the air a bit. When I really make poor decisions, that too may be grace, because I might see the error of my ways and get back on track.
We all know those amazing moments of grace. We should probably pay more attention to the mundane moments of grace, and allow grace to also work in and through us in those less graceful moments.
Blessings,
Ed
Do I see life all of life as grace? I hope I do, but I'm certainly more convinced that I see grace filled moments in my life. That's probably where the list grows. I've also had some not so grace filled moments, probably when the list gets shorter.
Perhaps it is that grace is not something to be kept like a score in a game. Grace just is. When I wake up each morning and I"m still alive, my wife is still there, my kids still there, that's grace. When I pour milk on my cereal and enjoy my second cup of coffee that's grace. When throughout the day opportunities arise to do what I do well, that's grace. When I go home and enjoy a good dinner that's grace. When I fall asleep on my bed that's grace.
When I have a shouting match with my wife or kids, that too is grace, because in the end it can lead to reconciliation, or clearing the air a bit. When I really make poor decisions, that too may be grace, because I might see the error of my ways and get back on track.
We all know those amazing moments of grace. We should probably pay more attention to the mundane moments of grace, and allow grace to also work in and through us in those less graceful moments.
Blessings,
Ed
Friday, February 18, 2011
Reflections for 2/18/11
"I was reading a magazine as I waited my turn at a barber shop one day when, triggered by a particular article and the photographs that went with it, there floated up out of some hitherto unexplored subcellar of me a character who was to dominate my life as a writer for the next six years and more."(F. Buechner "Listening to Your Life pp. 48-49)
While I haven't written any creative fiction since elementary school, I can picture how a character arises out of reading something. My usual judgement on the quality of writing is can I picture the scene or the character in my mind's eye. There are certain authors that immediately come to mind for me in that way. Tolkien, C.S. Lewis, JK Rowling. Many of the books I read in K-12 this would happen also, though many of those authors have faded in my memory.
I used to like to imagine having a large family. I would name those brothers and sisters, create their interests etc. That stopped when my second grade teacher investigated my stories and called me a liar. I also used to write short stories based on New Yorker Covers. My third grade teacher even sent one to the editor of that magazine and I got a response. I still think 3rd grade was the best year of elementary school for me.
I find that my fantasy world now seems stuck in the what could have beens and the what may never be's. I'm either the greatest high school wrestler ever and really focused on school and that sport. And in the what may never be's I'm leading a huge church or am some big mucky muck in the hierarchy.
Luckily there is enough positive reality to keep me sane and happy. But occasionally it's good to dream up a character named Ed, who never was, and may never be.
Blessings,
Ed
While I haven't written any creative fiction since elementary school, I can picture how a character arises out of reading something. My usual judgement on the quality of writing is can I picture the scene or the character in my mind's eye. There are certain authors that immediately come to mind for me in that way. Tolkien, C.S. Lewis, JK Rowling. Many of the books I read in K-12 this would happen also, though many of those authors have faded in my memory.
I used to like to imagine having a large family. I would name those brothers and sisters, create their interests etc. That stopped when my second grade teacher investigated my stories and called me a liar. I also used to write short stories based on New Yorker Covers. My third grade teacher even sent one to the editor of that magazine and I got a response. I still think 3rd grade was the best year of elementary school for me.
I find that my fantasy world now seems stuck in the what could have beens and the what may never be's. I'm either the greatest high school wrestler ever and really focused on school and that sport. And in the what may never be's I'm leading a huge church or am some big mucky muck in the hierarchy.
Luckily there is enough positive reality to keep me sane and happy. But occasionally it's good to dream up a character named Ed, who never was, and may never be.
Blessings,
Ed
Thursday, February 17, 2011
Reflections for 2/17/11
"Words-especially religious words, words that have to do with the depth of things-get tired and stale the way people do. Find new words or put old words together in combinations that make them heard as new, make you yourself new, and make you understand in new ways."(F. Buechner "Listening to Your Life" p.48)
I find words fascinating. I like to play with them. I find puns to be some of the best jokes around. I love stumbling across new words that I am not familiar with and then find out their meaning. I ran into one just a few days ago, palliative. I don't know how useful a word it actually is, but it sounds impressive.
In my church we have "traditional language" and "contemporary language." I do have to concentrate more in the traditional service than in the contemporary one. Words like vouchsafe can creep up on you if you are not paying attention. There is a beauty in them, but they are not necessarily holier.
Contemporary words of course are always evolving. Even old words start to take on new meanings as each generation comes around, claims them and molds them for their purpose and communicating with each other.
There are of course some words being bantered around these days that should be relegated to the history books and just left there. Used not to enlighten but to evoke a fear of something in the past, that most folks don't grasp on a very deep level.
I know that expanding my vocabulary allows for better communication and also helps me understand the world I live in better.
Blessings,
Ed
I find words fascinating. I like to play with them. I find puns to be some of the best jokes around. I love stumbling across new words that I am not familiar with and then find out their meaning. I ran into one just a few days ago, palliative. I don't know how useful a word it actually is, but it sounds impressive.
In my church we have "traditional language" and "contemporary language." I do have to concentrate more in the traditional service than in the contemporary one. Words like vouchsafe can creep up on you if you are not paying attention. There is a beauty in them, but they are not necessarily holier.
Contemporary words of course are always evolving. Even old words start to take on new meanings as each generation comes around, claims them and molds them for their purpose and communicating with each other.
There are of course some words being bantered around these days that should be relegated to the history books and just left there. Used not to enlighten but to evoke a fear of something in the past, that most folks don't grasp on a very deep level.
I know that expanding my vocabulary allows for better communication and also helps me understand the world I live in better.
Blessings,
Ed
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Reflections for 2/16/11
"There were memorable moments and unmemorable moments, and as far as my sense of being trapped is concerned, it was the unmemorable ones, the apparently random and everyday ones, that turned out to be the key moments, the key that let me out of the trap at last."(F. Buechner "Listening to Your Life" pp.47-48)
Like most people I have a datebook. Mine is still old-fashioned, I actually write in it. Someday I'll join the modern era and have a smart phone.
When I looked at today's date, it was empty. There were no appointments, no meetings. It was just a day. These are of course the type of days when something inevitably arises to take up all that free time. I could also get motivated perhaps and use the time to take care of some second and third level "to do's."
There are times that I feel trapped in my small little world. I wonder what "life in the big city," metaphorically speaking, would be like. And yet it is those unmemorable moments that keep my spirit's up. It will be in responding to the unforeseen, non-scheduled event.
Of course I'm not literally trapped at the moment. I've made choices that keep me where I am. And I intend to honor those choices. When the time comes to finally open that door and walk on out, I need to keep looking and working towards having the right key or remembering where I left it.
Blessings,
Ed
Like most people I have a datebook. Mine is still old-fashioned, I actually write in it. Someday I'll join the modern era and have a smart phone.
When I looked at today's date, it was empty. There were no appointments, no meetings. It was just a day. These are of course the type of days when something inevitably arises to take up all that free time. I could also get motivated perhaps and use the time to take care of some second and third level "to do's."
There are times that I feel trapped in my small little world. I wonder what "life in the big city," metaphorically speaking, would be like. And yet it is those unmemorable moments that keep my spirit's up. It will be in responding to the unforeseen, non-scheduled event.
Of course I'm not literally trapped at the moment. I've made choices that keep me where I am. And I intend to honor those choices. When the time comes to finally open that door and walk on out, I need to keep looking and working towards having the right key or remembering where I left it.
Blessings,
Ed
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Reflections for 2/15/11
"Because the word that God speaks to us is always an incarnate word-a word spelled out to us not alphabetically in syllables, but enigmatically, in events, even in the books we read and the movies we see-the chances are we will never get it just right. We are so used to hearing what we want to hear and remaining deaf to what it would be well for us to hear that it is hard to break the habit. But if we keep our hearts and minds open as well as our ears, if we listen with patience and hope, if ewe remember at all deeply and honestly then I think we come to recognize,beyond all doubt, that, however faintly we may hear him, he is indeed speaking to us, and that, however little we may understand of it, his word to each of us is both recoverable and precious beyond telling." (F. Buechner "Listening to Your Life pp. 46-47)
I'd like to believe I'm an open minded person. That I'm willing to listen to view points that are not mine. I also know that I am rarely persuaded by even the most reasonable arguments from those whose way of seeing the world is not mine.
I of course am not unique in that. I haven't yet met the person who comes into a discussion without a fairly fixed idea of what the answer is. Our ideologies are one of the biggest dividing lines that our world maintains. That division is the very mud that keeps things moving at a snails pace.
It is hard not only to listen to others, but to listen to God as well. In order to hear that voice, we have to shut out all the other voices clamoring for attention, including our own. To let go of all pre-conceived ideas and biases we have. Yeah I know good luck with that.
Perhaps the Quakers have it right to sit in silence until someone is moved to speak. I haven't been to a meeting to know if it actually works. My cynical side would find it hard to believe.
I know that most of us tend to listen, to read or to watch only those mediums that we agree with. It is certainly easier and less painful. Those few moments that I've opened myself up to other mediums I'll admit my stomach gets churning. And perhaps the only thing I learn is at least what drives the other side.
Blessings,
Ed
I'd like to believe I'm an open minded person. That I'm willing to listen to view points that are not mine. I also know that I am rarely persuaded by even the most reasonable arguments from those whose way of seeing the world is not mine.
I of course am not unique in that. I haven't yet met the person who comes into a discussion without a fairly fixed idea of what the answer is. Our ideologies are one of the biggest dividing lines that our world maintains. That division is the very mud that keeps things moving at a snails pace.
It is hard not only to listen to others, but to listen to God as well. In order to hear that voice, we have to shut out all the other voices clamoring for attention, including our own. To let go of all pre-conceived ideas and biases we have. Yeah I know good luck with that.
Perhaps the Quakers have it right to sit in silence until someone is moved to speak. I haven't been to a meeting to know if it actually works. My cynical side would find it hard to believe.
I know that most of us tend to listen, to read or to watch only those mediums that we agree with. It is certainly easier and less painful. Those few moments that I've opened myself up to other mediums I'll admit my stomach gets churning. And perhaps the only thing I learn is at least what drives the other side.
Blessings,
Ed
Monday, February 14, 2011
Reflections for 2/14/11
"Every once in a while, if only to keep their hands in, Christians are supposed to be Christs to each other for Christ's sweet sake, so I steeled myself and went to call on her one winter afternoon. I expected the worst, of course, because that is my nature. I expected a long, dreary monologue. I expected plenty of complaints with some tears to go with them. I expected to feel awkward and inadequate. I expected to be bored and hoped to get away as soon as I decently could. And I couldn't possibly have been more wrong on every count."(F. Buechner "Listening to Your Life" p. 46)
One of my favorite things to do as a priest is pastoral visits to shut ins. I have colleagues that will do it, but hate it. I truly enjoy it. I'm not sure why, but those visits energize me. I get to listen to stories and people sharing their lives and actually feel like I'm accomplishing something.
Part of it may be that I no longer have grandparents, and these visits remind me of times with them. I also know that these visits are important to these folks. It keeps them connected to their church. Often gives them some level of human contact and lets them know that they still matter.
Visiting hasn't always been easy. I understand some of what Buechner is speaking of. What will you talk about? Am I going to hear the same stories over and over again? Yet like Buechner I too have found that I am usually wrong about what is going to happen. And am often pleasantly surprised by what does.
I don't think Jesus would have it any other way.
Blessings,
Ed
One of my favorite things to do as a priest is pastoral visits to shut ins. I have colleagues that will do it, but hate it. I truly enjoy it. I'm not sure why, but those visits energize me. I get to listen to stories and people sharing their lives and actually feel like I'm accomplishing something.
Part of it may be that I no longer have grandparents, and these visits remind me of times with them. I also know that these visits are important to these folks. It keeps them connected to their church. Often gives them some level of human contact and lets them know that they still matter.
Visiting hasn't always been easy. I understand some of what Buechner is speaking of. What will you talk about? Am I going to hear the same stories over and over again? Yet like Buechner I too have found that I am usually wrong about what is going to happen. And am often pleasantly surprised by what does.
I don't think Jesus would have it any other way.
Blessings,
Ed
Sunday, February 13, 2011
Reflections for 2/13/11
"And by and large all was well with us. But down below there was another world where, by and large, all was not well. Friends got sick and died there. Accidents happened to people we knew. Children not much older than ours got into all sorts of grief. Couples got divorced, and men lost their jobs....until there were times when it seemed to me as thought the world below was a stormy sea with waves all around us as high as the hills we were encircled by, and the little patch of mountain where we lived was the only place left anywhere that was safe and dry." (F. Buechner "Listening to Your Life" p.45)
One of the hardest parts of my "job" is how much of the human condition I get to see first hand. On any given week, I will hear of someone who's gotten sick, or had a relative die, or lost a job, a marriage ending, kids getting into trouble. Yes it is part of a pastor's job, to create a place for people to unload some of life's heavier burdens for a moment. In many ways it is a privilege to be trusted that much to just listen. Maybe give some advice or comfort but mostly listen.
I realize in many ways I've been very fortunate in terms of having things go horribly wrong. Maybe when those storms of life crash on me, I may be in a better place to handle them, because of handling other people's crisis, but that may not be completely true. Who knows how I'll really respond when my parents get very sick and eventually die. Who knows how I might respond if a church I served really didn't like me and forced me out? How would I respond if my sons got into trouble with drugs, or got their girlfriend pregnant?
For the moment I should probably give thanks for healthy parents, semi-normal kids and a church that apparently likes me. Continue to be present for those for whom life is not being as nice to. And be ready for the reality that very few people get to go through life without a crisis of one kind or another.
Blessings,
Ed
One of the hardest parts of my "job" is how much of the human condition I get to see first hand. On any given week, I will hear of someone who's gotten sick, or had a relative die, or lost a job, a marriage ending, kids getting into trouble. Yes it is part of a pastor's job, to create a place for people to unload some of life's heavier burdens for a moment. In many ways it is a privilege to be trusted that much to just listen. Maybe give some advice or comfort but mostly listen.
I realize in many ways I've been very fortunate in terms of having things go horribly wrong. Maybe when those storms of life crash on me, I may be in a better place to handle them, because of handling other people's crisis, but that may not be completely true. Who knows how I'll really respond when my parents get very sick and eventually die. Who knows how I might respond if a church I served really didn't like me and forced me out? How would I respond if my sons got into trouble with drugs, or got their girlfriend pregnant?
For the moment I should probably give thanks for healthy parents, semi-normal kids and a church that apparently likes me. Continue to be present for those for whom life is not being as nice to. And be ready for the reality that very few people get to go through life without a crisis of one kind or another.
Blessings,
Ed
Saturday, February 12, 2011
Reflections for 2/12/11
"Unless you become like a child, Jesus said, you will never enter the Kingdom of Heaven, and maybe part of what that means is that in the long run what is good about religion is playing the way a child plays at being grown up until he finds that being grown up is just another way of playing and thereby starts to grow up himself. Maybe what is good about religion is playing that the Kingdom will come, until in the joy of your playing, the hope and rhythm and comradeship and poignance and mystery of it- you start to see that the playing is itself the first-fruits of the Kingdom's coming and of God's presence within us and among us." (F.Buechner "Listening to Your Life" p.44)
I guess I've always found religion fun. Maybe I've been lucky that the churches I've been a part of have always had a playful, goofy side to them. I haven't been to a church filled with perfect people. I've had plenty of laughs along the way.
Religion for me has been very child like. Not childish, that's something different. Child-like to me gives a sense of not knowing it all, but always asking questions. Religion as I've lived it has been more about questions than absolute answers. Usually one question leading to another. Maybe I'm just an inquisitive kid in an adult body.
And I suppose there is that child-like attitude in me, that wants religion to be kid friendly. I try to make church a place kids want to be. I never want to know of a time when a child didn't feel welcomed and accepted for who they were in my church. That my religion is practiced in a way that as the ring master at a circus says, "ladies and gentleman, children of all ages."
I do wonder where it is that religion stops being child like? Is there a time when we say I'm too old for that. I can't play that way any more? I hope not. I may have a different skill set as an adult. I hope I still play life with the same level of youthful enthusiasm I had as a kid.
Blessings,
Ed
I guess I've always found religion fun. Maybe I've been lucky that the churches I've been a part of have always had a playful, goofy side to them. I haven't been to a church filled with perfect people. I've had plenty of laughs along the way.
Religion for me has been very child like. Not childish, that's something different. Child-like to me gives a sense of not knowing it all, but always asking questions. Religion as I've lived it has been more about questions than absolute answers. Usually one question leading to another. Maybe I'm just an inquisitive kid in an adult body.
And I suppose there is that child-like attitude in me, that wants religion to be kid friendly. I try to make church a place kids want to be. I never want to know of a time when a child didn't feel welcomed and accepted for who they were in my church. That my religion is practiced in a way that as the ring master at a circus says, "ladies and gentleman, children of all ages."
I do wonder where it is that religion stops being child like? Is there a time when we say I'm too old for that. I can't play that way any more? I hope not. I may have a different skill set as an adult. I hope I still play life with the same level of youthful enthusiasm I had as a kid.
Blessings,
Ed
Friday, February 11, 2011
Reflections for 2/11/11
"Inside us all, she said, there was a voice of doubt and disbelief which sought to drown out our prayers even as we were praying them, but we were to pray down that voice for all the we were worth because it was simply the product in us of old hurts, griefs, failures, of all that the wold had done to try to destroy our faith."(F. Buechner "Listening to Your Life" p.42)
This winter has felt very long and weighty to me. I'm sure a good chunk of it has to do with so much snow, and cold. One place where I noticed the greatest effect was on my prayer life. I certainly do not have a perfect prayer life. In many ways it is like going to gym, part of me really doesn't want to, but the other part says get off your rear and go. I feel better when that side wins, because I know I'm getting physically healthier and am not nearly as tired.
The same holds true with prayer for me. I notice that when I let it slide that I start to feel sluggish, that small issues start to loom much larger than they need to be. I start to sense that all that used to be wrong with me, the world, whatever was coming roaring back.
And yet this past week when I really got focused again in my prayer life, those "demons" seem to withdraw. That's not to say that all stress was gone, every problem solved and life was perfect. That is hardly the case. What I found to be true is that I lost a sense of foreboding and I got a lot done that really needed to get done.
I do think that prayer is something that has to fight for its time within us. Life is full of disappointments and stress, and often it is those seemingly unanswered prayers that make us want to put that part of life out to the curb. I only know that in those moments, I have to keep pushing, just like going to the gym. I may not want to but that line of reasoning cannot win the day.
Blessings,
Ed
This winter has felt very long and weighty to me. I'm sure a good chunk of it has to do with so much snow, and cold. One place where I noticed the greatest effect was on my prayer life. I certainly do not have a perfect prayer life. In many ways it is like going to gym, part of me really doesn't want to, but the other part says get off your rear and go. I feel better when that side wins, because I know I'm getting physically healthier and am not nearly as tired.
The same holds true with prayer for me. I notice that when I let it slide that I start to feel sluggish, that small issues start to loom much larger than they need to be. I start to sense that all that used to be wrong with me, the world, whatever was coming roaring back.
And yet this past week when I really got focused again in my prayer life, those "demons" seem to withdraw. That's not to say that all stress was gone, every problem solved and life was perfect. That is hardly the case. What I found to be true is that I lost a sense of foreboding and I got a lot done that really needed to get done.
I do think that prayer is something that has to fight for its time within us. Life is full of disappointments and stress, and often it is those seemingly unanswered prayers that make us want to put that part of life out to the curb. I only know that in those moments, I have to keep pushing, just like going to the gym. I may not want to but that line of reasoning cannot win the day.
Blessings,
Ed
Thursday, February 10, 2011
Reflections for 2/10/11
"I was too occupied with my job to think much about the next novel I myself might write, but it occurred to me that, if and when the time ever came, it would be the presence of God rather than his absence that I would write about, of death and dark and despair as not the last reality but only the next to the last."(F.Buechner "Listening to Your Life" p.40)
Most of us have "to do lists." Generally speaking they involve housework, repairs etc. I guess there exists lists mentally and physically of things we'd really love to do. Maybe we should call these "love to do lists." They sort of exist in the form of what the movie title from a few years ago, called "a bucket list."
One of the things that I constantly wrestle with in my mind is what I actually would love to do. What outside of my passion for ministry and the day to day running of a church would I love to have the time to do? When ideas come to my mind, they don't stay very long. I have a hard time getting a grip on what "Ed" likes or wants to do. Usually to busy doing what others want or need Ed to do.
I doubt I would write a book. Maybe I could publish these reflections. Somehow I doubt there's much of a market. I know that if I were to write more than these reflections I'd be wishing for something like Buechner speaks of, talking more about presence and grace. Unfortunately sin and and despair seems to sell better. Any deep attempts at the other usually come off as theological fluff.
Getting back for a moment to the original question, what would a love to do list look like? How could it parallel those task lists that we all have? Are there realistic can do right now things, followed by a column of sooner rather than later, and a third column of wishful thinking and dreaming.
Blessings,
Ed
Most of us have "to do lists." Generally speaking they involve housework, repairs etc. I guess there exists lists mentally and physically of things we'd really love to do. Maybe we should call these "love to do lists." They sort of exist in the form of what the movie title from a few years ago, called "a bucket list."
One of the things that I constantly wrestle with in my mind is what I actually would love to do. What outside of my passion for ministry and the day to day running of a church would I love to have the time to do? When ideas come to my mind, they don't stay very long. I have a hard time getting a grip on what "Ed" likes or wants to do. Usually to busy doing what others want or need Ed to do.
I doubt I would write a book. Maybe I could publish these reflections. Somehow I doubt there's much of a market. I know that if I were to write more than these reflections I'd be wishing for something like Buechner speaks of, talking more about presence and grace. Unfortunately sin and and despair seems to sell better. Any deep attempts at the other usually come off as theological fluff.
Getting back for a moment to the original question, what would a love to do list look like? How could it parallel those task lists that we all have? Are there realistic can do right now things, followed by a column of sooner rather than later, and a third column of wishful thinking and dreaming.
Blessings,
Ed
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
Reflections for 2/9/11
"As far as the decision for or against belief in God was concerned, most of the time he had little idea even what the issues were because no one had ever made the effort to discuss them with him. If he rejected Christianity, it was usually such a caricature of it that I would have rejected it myself, and if he accepted it, the chances were he knew equally little about what he was accepting." (F. Buechner "Listening to Your Life" p. 38)
I've never considered belief in God to be a choice. I suppose at a certain level I did choose to believe in God, though it wasn't presented that way to me. It is true that I have always believed. I have also been blessed to have grown up in a church that allowed me to ask questions and wasn't afraid to answer them.
Obviously as a priest I have had further opportunities to continue to grow in my belief. I try to the best of my ability to not be afraid of questions or challenges to my beliefs. I hope that if a person were searching or struggling with faith that I would be able to create the proper environment to work through those issues.
I haven't had many conversations with folks who have chosen against belief, either in walking away from what once was, or never having one to begin with. I'm not sure what I would say. Again I hope I could listen to their journey as well. And if it was God's purpose, open the door to a new way of believing.
Blessings,
Ed
I've never considered belief in God to be a choice. I suppose at a certain level I did choose to believe in God, though it wasn't presented that way to me. It is true that I have always believed. I have also been blessed to have grown up in a church that allowed me to ask questions and wasn't afraid to answer them.
Obviously as a priest I have had further opportunities to continue to grow in my belief. I try to the best of my ability to not be afraid of questions or challenges to my beliefs. I hope that if a person were searching or struggling with faith that I would be able to create the proper environment to work through those issues.
I haven't had many conversations with folks who have chosen against belief, either in walking away from what once was, or never having one to begin with. I'm not sure what I would say. Again I hope I could listen to their journey as well. And if it was God's purpose, open the door to a new way of believing.
Blessings,
Ed
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
Reflections for 2/8/11
"When you find something in a human face that calls out to you, not just for help but in some sense for yourself, how far do you go in answering that call, how far can you go, seeing that you have your own life to get on with as much as he has his?"(F. Buechner "Listening to Your Life." p.38)
Most of us know the phrase, "I never forget a face." And for the most part it is true. Faces I remember, and sometimes I even can put a name with a face.
We will sometimes talk about not forgetting the look on someones face. The facial expressions of sadness, surprise or happiness. You can usually tell how someone is responding to what you are doing by looking at their face.
I often try to remember to put a face to something when making a decision, or about to open my mouth with something that I think might be witty. How would the face I'm picturing respond to that? How will that decision impact that "face."
The most obvious "faces" in our lives are our family and friends. But there may be other "faces" that need to be a part of the image as well. The face of the stranger, and as a Christian the face of Christ himself. How does what I'm doing affect that face?
Who has that face that causes you to rush right out, or who may cause you to pause and reflect before acting? All of us have faces that are important in our lives. Some have names that are always on our lips. Some we may have to dig deep to remember the name, and there are those nameless ones who share nothing with us except a common humanity.
Blessings,
Ed
Most of us know the phrase, "I never forget a face." And for the most part it is true. Faces I remember, and sometimes I even can put a name with a face.
We will sometimes talk about not forgetting the look on someones face. The facial expressions of sadness, surprise or happiness. You can usually tell how someone is responding to what you are doing by looking at their face.
I often try to remember to put a face to something when making a decision, or about to open my mouth with something that I think might be witty. How would the face I'm picturing respond to that? How will that decision impact that "face."
The most obvious "faces" in our lives are our family and friends. But there may be other "faces" that need to be a part of the image as well. The face of the stranger, and as a Christian the face of Christ himself. How does what I'm doing affect that face?
Who has that face that causes you to rush right out, or who may cause you to pause and reflect before acting? All of us have faces that are important in our lives. Some have names that are always on our lips. Some we may have to dig deep to remember the name, and there are those nameless ones who share nothing with us except a common humanity.
Blessings,
Ed
Monday, February 7, 2011
Reflections for 2/7/11
"At their strongest and saintliest, I believe they knew that in the last analysis they weren't really a spiritual elite, not really better than other people. They were just luckier."(F.Buechner "Listening to Your Life" p.37)
Yesterday I preached about being the salt of the earth, the light of the world etc. I believe that most of us are in fact salt of the earth people. We're not super heroes. We won't be famous for anything. We generally do what is right or at least attempt to. We don't go around saying notice me. Without salt of the earth folk, little would get done.
We generally take salt as a given in life. Yet in places where we expect it and it is absent, we notice. Same for salt of the earth folks, when they aren't around you notice immediately.
The times when I've had the privilege of working at food bank, I find it quite humbling actually. To see folks who are grateful for what is being given them, and to realize how often I am ungrateful for the multitude of things that I have.
I'm not a better person than most of the people I've encountered who are not as economically privileged as I am. I'm not wealthy by any American definition of that word. But I have enough. I am lucky in this economy to have a job, and not only a job but one that I love. I am lucky to have my health.
As a Christian I would call luck, blessings, though with a grain of salt if you will. Because if what I've described as blessings others do not have, I do not consider them cursed.
Maybe lucky is the right word.
Blessings,
Ed
Yesterday I preached about being the salt of the earth, the light of the world etc. I believe that most of us are in fact salt of the earth people. We're not super heroes. We won't be famous for anything. We generally do what is right or at least attempt to. We don't go around saying notice me. Without salt of the earth folk, little would get done.
We generally take salt as a given in life. Yet in places where we expect it and it is absent, we notice. Same for salt of the earth folks, when they aren't around you notice immediately.
The times when I've had the privilege of working at food bank, I find it quite humbling actually. To see folks who are grateful for what is being given them, and to realize how often I am ungrateful for the multitude of things that I have.
I'm not a better person than most of the people I've encountered who are not as economically privileged as I am. I'm not wealthy by any American definition of that word. But I have enough. I am lucky in this economy to have a job, and not only a job but one that I love. I am lucky to have my health.
As a Christian I would call luck, blessings, though with a grain of salt if you will. Because if what I've described as blessings others do not have, I do not consider them cursed.
Maybe lucky is the right word.
Blessings,
Ed
Sunday, February 6, 2011
Reflections for 2/6/11
"The Bible, as he presented it, is a book finally about ourselves, our own apostasies, our own battles and blessings." (F. Buechner "Listening to Your Life" p. 36)
One of many things that I find compelling about scripture is that I can see myself in it. Those times that I get things right as well as the times that I fall short of the mark.
It shows me how I can be faithful, as well as how easy it is to turn away. I will from time to time place myself as one of the characters and ask, what would I have done. I know what I'd like to believe I'd do, but then there's always reality.
Scripture is a living document for me because it is my story, the story of a human attempting to be in relationship with God.
Blessings,
Ed
One of many things that I find compelling about scripture is that I can see myself in it. Those times that I get things right as well as the times that I fall short of the mark.
It shows me how I can be faithful, as well as how easy it is to turn away. I will from time to time place myself as one of the characters and ask, what would I have done. I know what I'd like to believe I'd do, but then there's always reality.
Scripture is a living document for me because it is my story, the story of a human attempting to be in relationship with God.
Blessings,
Ed
Saturday, February 5, 2011
Reflections for 2/5/11
"Though I was no longer at Union when he gave his final lecture there, I am told that a number of students from the Jewish seminary across the street attended it and, before entering the great room, left their shoes in the corridor outside to indicate that the ground on which they stood with him was holy ground."(F. Buechner "Listening to Your Life" p. 34)
What actually makes something "holy?" One definition would be that it has been set apart by special prayers and blessings by duly authorized people. As a duly authorized person that works to a certain extent for me.
I also believe that something is "holy" when I or the beholder senses the presence of God in it. Thus many people, places and things, can be "holy," with or without a duly authorized prayer.
While I have never taken my shoes off as an act of reverence, I do understand the gesture. It of course comes from Moses' encounter with the burning bush. He of course had to be told to take his sandals off. I don't take my shoes off in church, though that has more to do with Western propriety than irreverence.
When I think of places where I do remove my shoes, a number of them involve outdoors and water. A cool mountain stream or the ocean come immediately to mind. I wonder if we take our shoes off, not only to not get them wet, but to take in the feel of the water, the sand, the smooth stones. The freedom of wiggling your toes.
Where for you are those places that you should literally or metaphorically take off your shoes? What and where for you is "holy ground."
Blessings,
Ed
What actually makes something "holy?" One definition would be that it has been set apart by special prayers and blessings by duly authorized people. As a duly authorized person that works to a certain extent for me.
I also believe that something is "holy" when I or the beholder senses the presence of God in it. Thus many people, places and things, can be "holy," with or without a duly authorized prayer.
While I have never taken my shoes off as an act of reverence, I do understand the gesture. It of course comes from Moses' encounter with the burning bush. He of course had to be told to take his sandals off. I don't take my shoes off in church, though that has more to do with Western propriety than irreverence.
When I think of places where I do remove my shoes, a number of them involve outdoors and water. A cool mountain stream or the ocean come immediately to mind. I wonder if we take our shoes off, not only to not get them wet, but to take in the feel of the water, the sand, the smooth stones. The freedom of wiggling your toes.
Where for you are those places that you should literally or metaphorically take off your shoes? What and where for you is "holy ground."
Blessings,
Ed
Friday, February 4, 2011
Reflections for 2/4/11
"He was a fool in the sense that he didn't or couldn't or wouldn't resolve, intellectualize, evade, the tensions of his faith but lived those tensions out, torn almost in two by them at times. His faith was not a seamless garment but a ragged garment that he clutched about him like a man in a storm." (F. Buechner "Living Your Life" pp.33-34)
One of the hardest things about being a person of faith, in my case a Christian, is living with the tensions, the contradictions and the parts that just plain baffle me. I find that faith is something that continues to challenge me intellectually, spiritually and emotionally.
I encounter fellow Christians, whose values seem foreign to me. I can't figure out how we worship the same God, have read the same Bible and yet have come to such radically different conclusions about what is important to living in relationship with God and with others.
I try not to ignore or explain away the parts that I'm not comfortable with or just don't understand. I was once asked did I take scripture literally or metaphorically. I said neither I take it seriously.
I am sure that I know people who think I'm foolish to believe in God. To try to be a follower of Jesus Christ. And yet I can think of no other way of living that makes any sense to me at all.
So I guess I too am a fool. A fool for Christ, a fool for the sake of the world. And a fool for not needing everything to be neat and tidy in any way, shape or form.
Blessings,
Ed
One of the hardest things about being a person of faith, in my case a Christian, is living with the tensions, the contradictions and the parts that just plain baffle me. I find that faith is something that continues to challenge me intellectually, spiritually and emotionally.
I encounter fellow Christians, whose values seem foreign to me. I can't figure out how we worship the same God, have read the same Bible and yet have come to such radically different conclusions about what is important to living in relationship with God and with others.
I try not to ignore or explain away the parts that I'm not comfortable with or just don't understand. I was once asked did I take scripture literally or metaphorically. I said neither I take it seriously.
I am sure that I know people who think I'm foolish to believe in God. To try to be a follower of Jesus Christ. And yet I can think of no other way of living that makes any sense to me at all.
So I guess I too am a fool. A fool for Christ, a fool for the sake of the world. And a fool for not needing everything to be neat and tidy in any way, shape or form.
Blessings,
Ed
Thursday, February 3, 2011
Reflections for 2/3/11
"But though much of what these teachers said remains with me still and has become so much a part of my own way of thinking and speaking that often I sound like them without realizing it, it is they themselves who left the deeper mark."(F. Buechner "Listening to Your Life" p. 32)
Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery I've been told, and I'm sure there are aspects of how I do things as a priest that if you knew who my "mentors" were you'd recognize them in me. Of course not all of who I am is based on imitating others. Inevitably though anyone who has had the smallest impact on our education, socialization etc, can be seen in us.
My hunch is this is true no matter what you are doing with your life. Almost every aspect of our existence started with someone pointing something out, or our observing them. Yes occasionally we can develop passions for things that no one would believe we would have based on who our parents and mentors were.
I have no idea why I love sports, until retirement my father had no time for pro sports. I'm pretty sure I know where I developed my political persuasion, though I've tempered it some.
I do wonder if there will be imitations of me in the future. Will there be a priest in the future who is doing it "Fr. Ed's way?" I'm sure my sons will have some of my likes and dislikes. They may even, as happens from time to time become something opposite of what I stand for. I still love them.
When you look at yourself, who do you see and hear from your past. Is there someone out there now, who does the same thing and sees or hears you?
Blessings,
Ed
Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery I've been told, and I'm sure there are aspects of how I do things as a priest that if you knew who my "mentors" were you'd recognize them in me. Of course not all of who I am is based on imitating others. Inevitably though anyone who has had the smallest impact on our education, socialization etc, can be seen in us.
My hunch is this is true no matter what you are doing with your life. Almost every aspect of our existence started with someone pointing something out, or our observing them. Yes occasionally we can develop passions for things that no one would believe we would have based on who our parents and mentors were.
I have no idea why I love sports, until retirement my father had no time for pro sports. I'm pretty sure I know where I developed my political persuasion, though I've tempered it some.
I do wonder if there will be imitations of me in the future. Will there be a priest in the future who is doing it "Fr. Ed's way?" I'm sure my sons will have some of my likes and dislikes. They may even, as happens from time to time become something opposite of what I stand for. I still love them.
When you look at yourself, who do you see and hear from your past. Is there someone out there now, who does the same thing and sees or hears you?
Blessings,
Ed
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Reflections for 2/2/11
"Maybe above everything, I wanted to do something for him; and since-as writer, reader, teacher-most of my doing in the past had involved paper and pen, books and study, a seminary seemed the proper place to do it."(F. Buechner "Listening to Your Life" p.31)
Why am I a priest? Good question and probably one that every priest should ask themselves annually, if not daily. I gave a flip answer to my grandfather when he asked, mainly because I knew the question was a jab and not actually a serious inquiry. I told him I was going to church anyway, may as well get paid. That stopped him in his tracks, he didn't see that coming.
But it really isn't an answer to the question. On the deepest levels the answer is I feel called to this vocation. However that is a very vague answer also and actually invites even more questions. I know what I enjoy about the priesthood. I love pastoring, being present with people in their joys and their sorrows. I know that I enjoy leading worship and preaching. I enjoy teaching about faith and scripture. I'm not as fond of all the administrative stuff and I'm not a huge fan of meetings.
I find that when I get bogged down in the less exciting aspects of being a priest, I can get unstuck by doing what I really enjoy, refocusing on that.
I believe this experience is not unique to my vocation. What is it that you do? Why are you doing what you do for a living? Is there a passion you have that can only be realized by being that? Or is it just a paycheck? I believe that when we are fully engaged in work and play that feeds our needs and draws on our strengths, we stop needing to work for the weekend and watch the clock.
Blessings,
Ed
Why am I a priest? Good question and probably one that every priest should ask themselves annually, if not daily. I gave a flip answer to my grandfather when he asked, mainly because I knew the question was a jab and not actually a serious inquiry. I told him I was going to church anyway, may as well get paid. That stopped him in his tracks, he didn't see that coming.
But it really isn't an answer to the question. On the deepest levels the answer is I feel called to this vocation. However that is a very vague answer also and actually invites even more questions. I know what I enjoy about the priesthood. I love pastoring, being present with people in their joys and their sorrows. I know that I enjoy leading worship and preaching. I enjoy teaching about faith and scripture. I'm not as fond of all the administrative stuff and I'm not a huge fan of meetings.
I find that when I get bogged down in the less exciting aspects of being a priest, I can get unstuck by doing what I really enjoy, refocusing on that.
I believe this experience is not unique to my vocation. What is it that you do? Why are you doing what you do for a living? Is there a passion you have that can only be realized by being that? Or is it just a paycheck? I believe that when we are fully engaged in work and play that feeds our needs and draws on our strengths, we stop needing to work for the weekend and watch the clock.
Blessings,
Ed
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
Reflections for 2/1/11
"If anyone had told me as little as a year or so earlier that I was going to do such a thing, I would have been no less surprised than if I'd been told I was going to enter the Indianapolis 500."(F. Buechner "Listening to Your Life" p.30)
If you had told me in my Senior year at Grinnell College, that I was going to spend most of my life as an Episcopal priest, I would have thought you were crazy. As a preacher's kid, I knew better than to do that. I so intentionally avoided the possibility that I had a career plan already in place.
I had so enjoyed being a tour guide for the college, that I did an internship with the Admissions Office. I figured I would go find a job as an Admissions Counselor for two years, work my way up to an Assistant Counselor, then an Associate until finally reaching the pinnacle as Director. Such an easy full proof plan.
And my first job was as an Admissions Counselor, however six months in, I knew I was not on the right path. And entered the ordination process, in spite of what I knew.
A piece of my original career failure that I hadn't really considered is that there was really only one college I wanted to work for.
I know for many people who go off to seminary it is a choice later in life. If you had asked them upon graduation if they saw seminary in their future, many would say no.
No matter when we finally find our true calling, one thing seems consistent, often what God calls us to do, is the last thing on earth we'd ever thought or imagined.
Blessings,
Ed
If you had told me in my Senior year at Grinnell College, that I was going to spend most of my life as an Episcopal priest, I would have thought you were crazy. As a preacher's kid, I knew better than to do that. I so intentionally avoided the possibility that I had a career plan already in place.
I had so enjoyed being a tour guide for the college, that I did an internship with the Admissions Office. I figured I would go find a job as an Admissions Counselor for two years, work my way up to an Assistant Counselor, then an Associate until finally reaching the pinnacle as Director. Such an easy full proof plan.
And my first job was as an Admissions Counselor, however six months in, I knew I was not on the right path. And entered the ordination process, in spite of what I knew.
A piece of my original career failure that I hadn't really considered is that there was really only one college I wanted to work for.
I know for many people who go off to seminary it is a choice later in life. If you had asked them upon graduation if they saw seminary in their future, many would say no.
No matter when we finally find our true calling, one thing seems consistent, often what God calls us to do, is the last thing on earth we'd ever thought or imagined.
Blessings,
Ed
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